I got back
from vacation on Friday. My family and I spent the week in Tennessee with my
brother-in-law and his family. That meant there were eleven of us in a pretty
good sized condo in the rolling hills of Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. Yes, the home
of Dollywood. As dirty and touristy as the town (you too Gatlinburg) turned out
to be, we had a good time. Of course there was the standard family brawl that
we Merlin’s are so famous for. If we didn’t have at least one petulant child
and pissed off parent, I’d think something was dreadfully wrong. That isn’t what
this is really about; I just mention it because I figure anyone that has ever
been on vacation with their family knows where I’m coming from.
Now my
bro-in-law is a good guy named Tim. Going forward I will be referring him as
TheProBum (@TheProBum on twitter if you’re interested), The Pro, The Bum, or
maybe just Bum (you get the idea). Bum and I get along really well for some
reason that doesn’t make sense to anybody. I stopped trying to make sense of it
a long time ago. We have a lot in common and enjoy one another's company. Simple
stuff.
I’m not sure
how we got to talking about working out, we had gotten into the moonshine a
little, but the subject came up. Now keep in mind Bum is in pretty good
condition for an old guy (probably a young guy too) and I am pretty “fluffy” as
they say (nice way of saying overweight and out of shape). It wasn’t always
that way for me but it is for today. Somehow on the way back from Gatlinburg we
came up with the idea of doing a vacation out west next year that would consist
of some sort of climbing Eiger Sanction style. Obviously for that to work for
me I was going to have to do some stuff.
What we
concocted was that while we were training for the Eiger, we would blog about it
and blow each other up on twitter. Trying to build a base of loyal followers
that would enjoy watching me suffer and maybe reach my goal. I guess on the
surface it sounds kind stupid but I have come to learn that you never know what
happens to your words and deeds when you blow them off into space. There could
be some other overweight, middle aged dude out there just looking for a reason
to get off the couch and do something himself.
I promise to
include plenty of video and pictures. I will also do my very best to provide
something to make you laugh such as a nice shot in the nads (that never gets
old). My blog will be rich with data and plenty of gripes about how old men
love being naked in the locker room. A fun, low ball hanging good time for
everyone.
Bum gave me
a short term goal; 40 push-ups, 20 pull-ups, and 40 sit-ups daily. As of this
morning, I can do 10, 1 (wouldn’t cut it at Parris Island), and 15. I currently
weigh 237 lbs and have no idea what my body fat percentage is because my fat
caliper needs a new battery. According to healthdiscovery.net a man my age,
height, and build should weigh between 154 – 166 lbs. Now I weighed 160 when I was
in high school so I don’t know how realistic that is but it’s a start. My Body Mass
Index is currently 33.1 which according to nhlbisupport.com is: “Obesity = BMI
of 30 or greater.” You wouldn’t think I was obese if you saw me but I’m definitely
overweight. I take three types of medication for my blood pressure as well as
something for indigestion. That’s the fast and dirty of it. There is lots of
room for improvement.
I did go to
the gym today and went 2 miles on the treadmill and did some very light weight
training. I do loath the treadmill as I feel like a hamster but again, it’s a
start. Anything more strenuous would blow out my knees and set me back even
farther.
Today is
training day 1. I have no idea how many training days there will be or where
this road will lead but I like to hope it will end with me pulling a very fat
George Kennedy up a mountain with a six pack of beer in my pack. If you don’t
get the reference watch the movie. Wish me luck; I’m going to need every bit of
it.
